The Birds!

And not 'strictly for...' either! I'm just lovin' it, I really am.

I just can't believe what I'm hearing. If I lift the Rondo just off it's magnet, say a millimeter, I get nothing! Not a peep, not even via the HA in the right ear. Drop it back down and WHAM... the birds just explode into my head. Such a lovely, lovely sound. I really had no idea I'd been missing it all this time. It's no wonder I don't hear bits of gossip! And believe me that's a huge miss hahaha. Now wondering if that will pick up too :)

It's just, I find myself daydreaming as I'm walking through the park/woodland with Luna and can't imagine now that it was quite so silent before... but can just lift off my CI to be reminded. I know you're probably thinking 'yeah yeah, we get it, the birds yeah, you can hear them, yeah yeah'... and I don't mean to bore but jeezo... it's so cool. It's a noise that, well, isn't noisy. It's a peaceful sound, very relaxing. Not irritating at all. I wouldn't care if I never heard the spin cycle on the washing machine ever again (for instance) but this... how come I didn't miss it, until I got to hear it again?  Perhaps I was just protecting myself... in a way? Just forgot all about it. Would be depressing otherwise... maybe?

Anyway, I just really wanted to mention, again, about the birdsong a CI gives you back. Who the hell knows what kind of birds, garden birds mostly of course, and I suppose I can figure out a blackie from a sparrow, but other than that... just birds. I finally managed to pinpoint one blackbird, but he was still too far off for me to see singing even with my specs on. Here he is:

'blackbird singing in the....' erm day-time

I've made some new friends via the CI too... have to say. Also new wearers, it's good to discuss things with them. 'How long do your batteries last?' (various models) 'what do you hear now?' and 'where did you get the stickers?' It's nice to be in the same boat, so to speak, and helpful. I can really recommend trying to meet others or have contact at least online, who also have a CI. Some folks have had it way worse than me, but not for long, and others have had problems with hearing for longer, but not so bad. Everyone has a different story to tell... all very interesting. I have yet to read a negative result (at least from a hard of hearing person) about their CI. All have improved to a significant degree... so even just that is very heartening.

One 'noise' I do worry about is these really minimal little ticks and peeps I hear late at night coming from the kitchen. 'Noise' in inverted commas as it's only just to be heard... but it is a sound. I think it could be the fridge or freezer dripping? J doesn't hear it at all so it's got me freaking a bit that it's mice I'm hearing as I'm pretty sure I saw a mouse in the attic a few weeks back (and the hair is standing up on my head just writing about that - bloody fright!) I try to ignore it, but it's only at night. It's not happening right now and it's quiet here at the moment so... w.t.f? I'm actually too scared to investigate further as well... it's at night! And what if it is mice? Hahaha. So. Just to prove that not all the extra sounds a CI provides are entirely welcome, but I'm still so happy to have been given one.

Keepin' on truckin'

... back and forth, back and forth to UMC. It all adds up, all those fares that you otherwise wouldn't be paying for. But again, grateful to have been given my CI, especially as the full bill notifications came in for... wait for it... €47K and €25K or thereabouts. So, honestly not moaning!

Since my last 'adjustment's were made, everything has sounded pretty darned good. Birds even better than before, and I thought it terrific first day already. Now, a certain someone said it wouldn't bother her if she never heard a bird again in her life, but ... well, that's not what it's about. The fact I can hear birdsong, which is actually really lovely, means I'm picking up higher sounds. Therefore speech is more accessible to me which is really the main reason for hoping on improved hearing eh? Well, to me it is.
I read once that humans actually do rely on the sound of birds because when you don't hear them (when you otherwise should - and you're not deaf) there is something badly wrong... like a storm coming, that kind of thing. I'm sure old time miners were on the alert for no birdsong from their wee canaries as it was then probably already dead from escaping gas, giving them a (pretty minimal but still) chance to escape. Poor wee canaries eh?

Music? Still working on that as I do notice differences, (not always improvements) so it's not great as yet. I've read that it's a good idea to listen to the music of individual instruments - only piano or only violin, instead of a band, or orchestra - to train your brain to recognise things better. Don't know if I'll go that far actually but good to know there is a method for it.

Have been at a scheduled 'CI Day' in Breda recently too. Interesting talks given by each of the three CI manufacturers (Med-El, Cochlear and Advanced Bionics), basically for 'interested parties' and no 'hard sell'. They are all much of a muchness, but also, all different, if you get my meaning. Pros and cons to each model and in my opinion best chosen by your surgeon as he'll know which would suit your type of hearing loss better as well as have more experience. Of course you have to trust the surgeon not to be 'on the take' hahaha, but I'm pretty sure that is definitely not the case here in NL. I'm very happy with my Med-El Rondo in any case.

There was also the opportunity to learn 'What's in my briefcase' from each of the manufacturer's too, and as there was only me and one other person with a Med-El, (and only me with the Rondo), we had practically a private consultation explaining all the bits and bobs (cables etc) that come in the snazzy briefcase with the CI. I also met up with a woman I met before via another CI wearer and she had since had her op and was to be switched on in a few days... which has since happened, much to her joy so far. Her and her man gave me a lift to Utrecht station, which was half the way home, and we had a fine old blether in the back of the car.

I have realised I am lucky to have 2 different sets of mics still in my possession from an old employer that, while a bit old are still in good working order and can be coupled to my CI in various ways (I now know since the talks!). Dead handy, if a bit of a rigmarole. One model (the Comfort Contego) I used for Tai Chi last week. I gave the mic to the teacher who clipped it to her t-shirt. I wore the receiver and audio loop around my neck and it made a huge difference to how much I could hear directly in my CI and HA. Who knew she'd been calling out the names of each exercise every time? Not me hahaha! Since the CI, I at least heard that she was speaking (quietly) but just thought it was 'next, next, next'... turns out it's the names. So aye, CI still needs a helping hand and glad to be able to use that mic.!

The other one (Oticon Lexis which was apparently changed to be called the Amigo T10 and is in any case no longer available for some reason) I discovered has a connector that fits to the Opus2 behind-the-ear model CI. I can then plug the Lexis via a separate cable into the computer and this then works for listening on Skype etc., directly to my CI. But then it's still only one ear, same as when I use the streamer to my HA... so hoping to find an adapter jack that will take two input jacks. Getting there eh? Neither of these models have bluetooth so it's all cables and bollix but they were state of the art and not inexpensive when I got them and are still very useful. Hmmm.... streamer is bluetooth so perhaps i should work out how to get that going via the laptop. I know it works bluetooth via my phone but have never managed to do it on the computer for some reason and just use the cable. It's getting complicated to say the least!

My latest trip to UMC was once again for the speech therapist. We've been trying out using the phone with the CI. I'm a bit reluctant to use the phone still as it's not great (yet?). I can hear, aye, and got probably 80% of the sentences she was reading out from her end, but it was still a strain, and this was with a speech therapist articulating her words and talking slowly. And honestly, the best intentioned caller who even knows very well or has been told/reminded that I am HoH, will of course always begin to articulate their words but... nah... just doesn't last. I'd probably be the same myself so I'm not at all critical, just stating fact. Will be trying how it all goes with phone speaker on next time, on both land line and mobile phones. The comical thing when using a handset though... you have to hold it to the CI, where the mic is, of course, and not your ear. Also on my left hand side, so not what I'd automatically do. And if you move your arm, which is easily done when you have your arm up (think; 'scratching your head mode') you lose contact. Meanwhile I'm sticking to texting!

While waiting for my appointment a man in the waiting room politely asked if I was happy with my BAHA. Now these are similar, but different - they click onto your head, whereas a CI hangs on magnetically (and of course there are other differences). So I proceeded to 'sell' the Rondo to him as well as I could... 'night and day', 'fantastic' (as compared to a HA, which he wore one of), and all things positive to encourage him, as he personally was being considered for one he told me. He came back from his appointment while I was still waiting and he might be taking part in some trial or other... didn't have time to explain it fully but boy they're busy with all sorts there. So that was interesting, and I do think I helped him :)

I make a great advocate for them, me! I should hire myself out!

Travelling light

It's been an eventful week since last blether. J and I went to Edinburgh for the weekend to see the offspring and I've since been back to UMC for more adjustment.

I think I mentioned, I was looking forward to trying out my CI surrounded by familiar accents. Turns out it's not as straightforward as I thought it would be - "here, I don't pick up words without listening properly, there I do" (to paraphrase my own words) - not at all actually. I did get the feeling that I understood things perhaps marginally easier in English when I listen and it's true that I do hear a tad more 'in the passing', (I really checked to see). But nothing really that I could call useful in any degree. So HUH!... me and 'my theory'. This is a recurring theme hahaha, but another story.

I used my 'I am a CI wearer' pass as Schiphol airport which means I don't have to go through a scanner. Not a problem there, they just gave me a thorough pat down. But at Edinburgh, on the way home... oho! suspect no. 294 turns up (me!). Jeezo.

After having a lovely weekend, my home town really let me down. I showed the card and was directed through a door next to the scanner... so far so good, but then... 'You can go through this scanner instead of the gate one'... ('this one' being the one where you stand and raise your arms and are well... scanned). So I said, 'no, I can't with my CI.' As I understood it (more later) the scanner can cause damage to the implant so, no thanks! 'That's ok, our coordinator (or someone) will now speak to you then.' Comes a very officious young man, got his whole spiel down pat. Meanwhile, J insists on joining me while being spoken to (thank goodness, but god the FUSS they made! You'd think he was trying to escape the stalag).

Spiel - 'I understand you have a CI, but this scanner is perfectly harmless so just go through there please. Oh you are refusing that? Then we have an alternative for you. If you'd just like to follow my colleague, two female officers will search you in private. Your luggage will also be opened and searched through thoroughly.' What?! No feckin' way! Why such a hostile carry on? It was just scandalous.

We ask how long this would take (we've only got like 40 minutes before the flight to A'dam takes off). 'I really couldn't say madam.' 'Well, why do I have to do this?! I can't go through the scanner, my bloody head could explode for all I know!' I was bloody frantic by now really but I said ok, I'm being forced through the scanner, on your head be it if there is any damage. 'No madam, it will definitely not be on my head, it's your decision. I have offered you an alternative'. Aye right! total bastard that ye ur!

So, anyway I was really bottling it by this time and almost crying to be honest. But here's the daft bit... I handed the processor (the part that attaches to my head) to the other wee man before going through the scanner. He then hands it to the woman who called me through, who then handed it back to me. I really refused to wear it and he accepted that. Then phew, ok, my head didn't explode and everything still works but my heart was going like the clappers believe you me. And the bomb I was carrying, (aka my CI!) didn't go through any scanner or get checked at all. Stupid, stupid, stupid. Proof positive that they are one and all eejits!

Now, not done with that whole story yet but let me just interject this next bit... I have since read more and enquired about 'scanners at airports'. Turns out I was perhaps just a wee bit too worried (are you sensing a pattern? :) ). It's things like MRI scans and PET scans, those medical affairs, that I can't have without mentioning things to allow them to 'take measures', as they can affect the implant negatively. The thing about airports is that I will then definitely set off an alarm, and the pass is just to explain why that has happened. It can also perhaps upset the settings on the CI but that's easily enough remedied, if inconvenient. There is no head explosion involved. hehe, so phew! But seriously, I was upset about the treatment. Why could they not just give me a pat-down like in Schiphol? Use one of the paddle scanners to avoid my head or something? And why, when my luggage was already through the scanner (and cleared might I add) would it then also need to be opened specifically, seeing as I was being searched? It's just ludicrous and extremely customer unfriendly. Telling me 'it's perfectly safe even with a CI' (which turned out to be true, ok) didn't really help because they'd say anything really and you just know they don't know a thing about CIs so... oh I'm so angry about it really. Rats!

So anyway, I'm finally through, as is James, but his bag is held back because... wait for it... the toiletries are not in a sealed (read ziplock) transparent plastic bag like the ones lying around on offer. They are in a sealed (read zipped) transparent plastic bag - the same one they've been in for numerous previous trips here there and everywhere. Quelle horror! So everything had to be overloaded into other bags, just as transparent as the original only not the ones as provided. You wouldn't credit it really. Oh and a tube of whatever was confiscated, as too large, despite having only dregs in it and despite being in that bag for years and loads of trips already. You despair, you really do, but we got away and onto the flight just in time. Bloody carry on.

Just as a wee tidbit to add to the whole scanner affair let me tell you this story. I once acted as 'secret visitor' (can't remember exactly the name) at 'an airport'. I had to try and smuggle a weapon through the gate. This was to check just how well the (random) checks worked. This day I had a 'gun'... a metal lump in the shape of a pistol, stashed in my bra. Four times out of the five 'trips' I made that particular day my contraband was missed. That's four times out of five. If I'd been a baddy, I was through! One person even touched it and asked what it was. I said 'underwiring' and I got the 'have a good flight'. The fifth time, although I got 'captured', they then just laughed ('oh... you!) and still didn't ask to see my weapon. Just took me at my word so really I could just have been lying some more. There were a few unhappy border guards that day believe me. I was dead pleased with myself and my acting abilities hehehe, but really, not good eh? So yes, I understand we do have to have checks, and be thorough blabla... but I still feel it was all a tad overboard and not handled correctly at Edinburgh. Oh, one good point, J was there to help me hear what was said, but thanks to the very thing causing the problem, I heard it all :)

Anyway... today I've been at UMC once more for adjustments. The last two weeks on the latest settings haven't been great if I'm honest. Too much 'boom' with bass sounds and too much 'tinkle' with higher sounds (it's hard to know what to call it hehehe). Still better than my hearing aids, so it's crap to be critical, but it wasn't really comfortable and I preferred the previous setting, but on trying that out, I was noticing more 'boom' on there too.

So we fiddled about, fiddled about, up and down and fiddled about... trying different settings and changing things back and forward. It's quite difficult and they are always pretty patient really... and we may just have cracked it. This sounds pretty damn good. There is a limit of course on just how loud and 'complete' the sounds can be adjusted to.

You have to laugh though - every time, and I mean every time the audiologist asks, 'how does that sound now?'... then that's it, he stops talking! He looks at you with a questioning expression, awaiting your answer... in silence! How the hell can anyone say if they don't talk to let you listen and decide? I tell them this every bloody time but they always forget - it's a bit frustrating. It can't just be me they do this with. Of course then they do a bit rambling on, saying nonsense to fill the space and let me listen for a bit, but why can't they finally learn that part? Just do it already? It's daft really.

My appointment next week is to adjust my hearing aids to their best levels... not really sure they'll be able to fix them as they're 'old' now. I'd rather have them adjusted though, than already go through the whole shenanigans of getting new ones. It takes soooo feckin' long to get a) earpieces that fit well, b) the HA that is best suited to your audiogramme and c) them finally adjusted so that you hear best with them despite what said audiogramme shows! These ones, I do really, really like them, but they took about 18 months to get to a stage where I wasn't back at the shop every couple of weeks... drove me bonkers. And I have 'in the ear' earpieces, with a 'behind the ear' aid, which gave unique problems of their own. I still refuse to go back to the 'shell' type earpieces though, as I hear so much better (when they work right!) with the in-ear ones. The girl in the shop said she wouldn't allow me to get them as they've been rather problematic to say the least. But I really don't think she can make that call so, sorry dear but I'll decide that part.

In NL, we get new aids via health insurance (covered up to 75%, I think is the deal at the moment?) every 5 or 6 years depending on this that or the other. Mine are now six years old so definitely due but what with this year being CI year, I really hope to postpone it all for at least another year, hopefully two. UMC will hopefully adjust both aids to fit my right ear stats and I'll be all hunkydory for a whiley yet.

I really am so lucky. Mind you, I'd prefer ears that did what they are designed for... hearing!